You have a copy of it in your drive. Here is what I want you to think about when you read it:
- What kind of text is this?
- Is there sufficient detail?
- Have I explained what I see, hear, smell, feel and taste?
- Have I said what I think, do, feel (inside) and say?
- What have I done well?
- What could I do better?
- What can you take from this piece of text and use it to improve your own?
Tantrix Battle by Anna
“3, 2, 1... 32!!” I said excitedly while also holding up my fingers, three on my right hand and two on my left. My brother, Matt, was holding up two fingers on his right hand, and five on his left: 25.
He frowned in disappointment, then asked “Another game?” with a grin on his face.
“OK,” I agreed. We were in the middle of discussing Game of Thrones and while we both enjoyed playing Tantrix, the real reason we wanted to keep playing was because we wanted to finish our conversation.
My brother and I play Tantrix every time we are together. We are pretty evenly matched, which makes for some intense battles! This summer we decided to keep score, with the first to ten having to buy the other lunch at Driving Creek Cafe, our favourite place in Coromandel.
Of course we both enjoyed the game, but what we both enjoy the most about playing Tantrix is spending time together. Often we end up in tears of laughter over some silly thing or another. Sometimes we get annoyed with each other, and one of us eventually says “I’ve had enough now.” Because we are such good friends, we both understand when it is time for a break - we will resume the game later on.
Once, a friend of ours, Sophie, asked if she could play with us. Matt and I looked at each other. I knew that he was thinking exactly the same thing as me: “How can we tell her nicely that we don’t play with anyone else except each other?” Sophie saw the look pass between us and realised her mistake saying, “Oh, sorry guys, I didn’t realise, never mind, I will just watch.” I instantly felt bad and said “No no, that’s ok, you can play,” but she said she didn’t mind. I was glad because it really is Matt and my special tradition.